Viz

Viz has been gracing British newsagents' shelves since 1979. Its irreverent mix of bad language, childish cartoons and sharp satire has seen its creators hauled over the coals by the United Nations, questioned by Scotland Yard's anti-terrorist branch and exhibited in the Tate Gallery. Viz's comic characters, such as the Fat Slags, Sid the Sexist, and Roger Mellie the foul-mouthed Man on the Telly, as well as its hugely popular Top Tips and Profanisaurus sections, are firmly established as national institutions, just like Broadmoor Hospital for the Criminally Insane. *Manufacturer's estimate.

LetterRocks

CHECK MATE! • THE LEWIS Chessmen are perhaps the most famous artefacts of our islands' prehistory. Carved from walrus tusks between 1150 and 1200, these iconic figures are known and loved by everyone who sees them in the British Museum and the National Museum of Scotland.

Would YOU push a button that would give Vladimir Putin haemorrhoids? • HE is the most vilified dictator in the world, a man with no scruples, no conscience and no moral compass. For 26 years VLADIMIR PUTIN has held an iron grip over Russia. The lives of his people – and indeed every human being on the planet – are of little consequence to this cold despot; to him they are simply disposable assets in his never-ending quest to extend the reach of his power. The number of people who have suffered at his hands is incalculable, and if there was any justice in the world, he too would be made to suffer for his crimes. But if you could push a button that somehow, inexplicably, gave Vladimir Putin the most horrendous case of PILES… would you push it? We went on the street to see what the Great British public had to say…

WHO WANTS TO BE A TRILLIONAIRE? • I WAS headline news last month when South African-born tech mogul Elon Musk became the planet's first TRILLIONAIRE as his wealth hit THIRTEEN figures. But not for the first time, the world's media was spreading disinformation and fake news. Because for the past ten years, a trillionaire has been living quietly in a Northumberland town with nobody – not even his friends or family – being aware of his staggering wealth.

20 THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT PRIME MINISTERS AND HOVERCRAFT • THEY are the leaders of the majority party in parliament, and able to travel on both land and water. They are the residents of 10 Downing Street, and they float on a cushion of air. They are the First Lord of the Treasury and can travel at speeds of up to 80mph. They are PRIME MINISTERS and HOVERCRAFT. And whilst we may think we know a lot about them, we actually don't. How do they work? When were they invented? Which one was shot dead in 1812? Here are...

CHIP HAPPENS! • Hull’s ‘Lord of the Fries’ declares “It’s Spudmageddon!”

ARCHAEOLOGISTS' ROYAL FIND • THE TEAM of archaeologists who unearthed the body of King Richard III in a car park in Leicester have made another fantastic discovery. Because the same scientists believe they may now have uncovered the remains of one of the 15th century Plantagenet king's descendants - Queen Elizabeth II.

Roger's Profanisaurus • An Update of Britain's Favourite Profanities with Profanisaurus

BAN SOLO! Nation's teens shun rock gods • ROCK music chiefs have blasted Britain's youngsters after a survey found that fewer adolescents than ever are thrilled by extended guitar solos. Just 20% of under-18s admitted to feeling in any way stimulated by the sort of finger-plaiting demonstrations of squealing fretboard virtuosity that have held rock music audiences spellbound since the sixties and seventies.

THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE! • Viz reporter finds SHOCKING proof of UK government's decades-long UFO cover-up

Why I Weep for the Robin Hood Tree of Hearts