Thirteen Ways to Kill Lulabelle Rock

Starred review from November 20, 2023
Woolf debuts with a dazzling noirish romp through a near future world in which the rich and powerful can have themselves cloned into perfect copies called Portraits, which are capable of fulfilling myriad functions, but are treated as subhuman. Actor Lulabelle Rock, desperate for good publicity ahead of her next film, which is projected by the media to be a flop, commissions her 13th Portrait and tasks her with murdering her extant predecessors, the 12 previous Portraits, in the manner of a serial killer to drum up press coverage. Armed with a self-driving car, a dossier on each target, and a gun, the Portrait, who calls herself Death after the Tarot card, embarks on her grim mission across the streets of Bubble City, a satirical take on Hollywood. Each killing proves harder than the last, as Death faces doppelgängers who each embody different aspects of Lulabelle’s personality—party girl, fashion model, homemaker, would-be artist—and comes to question her own identity and purpose. Worse, she even begins to sympathize with her targets. Woolf sucks readers in from the start and mines her clever premise for suspense and surprises. By turns sad, introspective, and defiantly optimistic, this tale of self-hatred, self-love, and self-discovery delights. Agent: Lina Langlee, North Lit Agency.

November 1, 2023
Lulabelle Rock is a quintessential washed-up celebrity. The roles offered to her now are lowbrow, and she has to accept any and all advertising opportunities. And yet she's on the precipice of returning to stardom--if only she can find that perfect role. In order to work enough to maintain the lifestyle required in Bubble City, Lulabelle has created Portraits, a technology manifesting exact clones of those wealthy enough to afford them. Our narrator is the thirteenth Portrait of Lulabelle Rock, and she is given the unique task to dispose of those who came before her. As she traverses the seedy underbelly of Bubble City, thriving in plain sight, our Lulabelle's singular focus is hindered by her interactions with the other Portraits. When she begins to develop her own sense of morality, an evolution that coincides with Lulabelle's developing romantic feelings for one of her targets, the thirteenth Portrait of Lulabelle Rock must decide where her loyalty lies. Ideal for fans of Orphan Black and Killing Eve, this near-future tech-noir is guaranteed to entrance as much as it perplexes.

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